>Rule of thumb: Never screw around with someone who warps dimensions.
>One moment I'm in a parking garage, the next I find myself sitting underneath a tree, out in a field. I have to admit though, it is a nice change of scenery. Judging by the time of day, it was about dusk.
>I hope everyone else is okay though, and I don't hear the other two voices in my head. But I'm still here. That will have to come later, right now I need to get my bearings.
>Wait a moment, I don't remember having my knapsack with me, I left that at the security booth.
>Going through it, I found all of my personal belongings were in there, so someone's looking out for me.
>As soon as I shut the bag however, I was face to face with a miniature horse.
>Miniature horses however, don't have purple and black manes, are pastel colored (in this one's case gray), wear goggles, and have wings. On a second glance, they also don't have writing quills on their flanks.
>"Hi there."
>And they sure as shit don't talk.
"Wot the hell are you?"
>Smooth.
>"Haven't you ever seen a pegasus before? I can't say that I've seen...You, before."
"A pegasus? Can't say that I have."
>"Have you seen a pony before?"
"Yes. But I cannae say they look like you. 'Specially the wings."
>"Well, all ponies don't look alike, otherwise we wouldn't be able to tell one another apart. Do all of you look alike?"
>Best humor her. Is it a her? Not really all that sure, she sounds female anyway.
"Not quite. We all look different."
>The look on her face said it all: Why yes, I would like to know more.

"I'm a human. Well, in my case, I guess that's the closest you could get to describing me."
>"What's a 'hue-min'?"
"Me, that's wot."
>It seems even in a whole new dimension, nobody appreciated 'smartass', given by the look on her face.
Best keep to pleasantries. "Name's Jet. Nice to meet ya, pony." I offered my hand, wait, do horses even shake hooves?
"Jet? Like the stone?" I gave a quick nod. "Nice to meet you, Jet, my name is Scribble." I guess they do, since she put her hoof in my hand.
>Okay, laughing at the pony's name? Not a good way to really introduce yourself.
"Scribble?! Are ya takin' the piss?"
>"Am I what now?" She spoke flatly.
"Joking. Figure of speech." I held up my hands in the universal defensive stance. "I wasn't tryin' to offend ya, it's just a 'Scribble' to me is, well, a squiggly."
>I swore I heard her snort. "But I'm not a 'Squiggly', I'm Scribble."
"Really. I gathered that much."
>That's how I had begun this odd adventure through a magical horse land.

>First night was... Odd.
>We both were sitting under the stars, since one, I don't think she'd want to take me home.
>Two, I don't want to be stuck in some weird magical horse's house.
>Three, we both didn't know where the fuck we were going. I didn't, anyway.
>Ah well, being in the woods isn't so bad. Make a campfire, sit around it... Forget I have no food. Shit.
>At least you had a small tent strapped to your bag.
>The po...Scribble had been outside, while I considered trying to sleep for the past hour.
>So I slipped out of the tent and sat down by the fire.
>"Can't sleep?"
"Nope. Yourself?"
>"I wanted to see the stars a little longer."
"Mm. They're nice, yeah?"
>"Yeah? Are there stars where you're from? You've yet to tell me, well, anything."
"Of course there's stars." I stared skyward for a moment, trying to see if I could trace any constellations. "I...Think there's Canis Major there, yeah?"
>"Where?" That piqued her interest, and she was soon staring over my shoulder.
"Watch my finger." I traced out the pattern, well, what I thought it was anyway.
>"I think you're right. You have the same constellations?"
"At least that one."
>That made her giggle and clop her hooves together. "So, you gonna tell me more?"
"Sure. You wanna know a secret?"
>Her eyes lit up. "Do I?!"
>I leaned in real close and whispered in her ear. "I'm not from around here."
>I got a hoof to the shoulder for that one, but she laughed. Rolled her eyes, but still laughed.
>"You don't say?!"
"I do indeed. All joking aside, I am curious. Any idea where we are?"
>"Yes and no."
"Let me guess. You're not from around here."
>"Exactly!"
"Isn't that just grand? We're both lost then, I take it."
>"That's the fun in an adventure, Jet. Pick a destination, and let your hooves take you as far as you wish. Besides, you're lost, not me."
"Then could you tell me where we are?"
>"No idea."
"See? Yer lost."
>"Am not, I'm on an adventure."
I had to roll my eyes at that one. "Yer weird."
>"Thank you. Now, how did you end up on your adventure?"
"That's wot we're calling it now? An adventure? Sure, why not, I'll bite. I am but a traveller, who ended up in a bad situation."
>"Really? And how did that happen?"
>Damn, hoping she was gonna drop it there. Quick, think of something.
"Does this place have, um, 'magic'?"
>"It sure does."
"Really? Well, where I'm from does too, and I just happened to get caught up in, well, how to d'scribe it, a uh, a dimension warp. Next thing I know, I'm here, and as I'm looking at my things, there you are."
>Half truth, but let's face it, 'Fighting someone who wanted to warp a city into his own personal playpen' would probably scare her off.
"I think I'm gonna turn in."
>"Into what?"
"...Nevermind." I got up, dusted my pants off, and went back into the tent.

>I was surprised to find that 1) I was still in the same place I fell asleep, not tied up somewhere, 2) All my stuff was present and accounted for, and 3) Scribble was nowhere to be found.
>Nope, wait, a quick scan of the area, and she was asleep in a tree.
>At least she got the fire put out. That would have been bad, first night here and already you're setting everything ablaze? It's not Tuesday.
"Oi! Scribble!"
>She mumbled her annoyance at being rudely awoken, mentioning a "wonder" something or other.
"You're the adventurer. Wot's there to eat 'round here?"
>"You're the traveller. How did you fend for yourself?"
"Usually travelled me behind to the shop and grabbed something."
>At least she got a small laugh out of that.
"Are we even near civilization?"
>"I think so." I watched as she nosed inside a nearby saddlebag, adorned with that same writing quill as on her flank. "Founf fit." She had a scroll in her mouth, which she dropped down to me.
Opening it up, nothing looked like it should. Just great. "How the fook 'm I supposed to read this?"
>"Just hold it open for me, silly."
"Oh. Right." I did as I was told, as the pegasus glided down and hovered to about my height. Which, 5'3 wasn't very high off the ground.
>"We are near...Vanhoover."
"Wot."
>"You know, Vanhoover!"
"No, I don't."
>"Oh, right, not from around here." She cleared her throat. "It's a good sized city, nowhere near as big as Canterlot, or Las Pegasus. We can catch the train there, and take it to just about anywhere... That is, if I had any money."
>She smiled sheepishly, and there was the sound like a dog toy squeaking accompanying it. What was that about?
"I think I got something."
>"You have bits?"
"Again, wot?"
>"Bits. That's the Equestrian currency."
"I take that back then. The money I have is worthless."
>"Well, horseapples."
"Don'tcha mean 'shit'?"
>"That's what I said, 'horseapples'."
>This was hell. Me own personal, technicolor, talking horse hell.

>We had made the trek to, ugh, Vanhoover, in about 2 hours time, not bad, although now we were both tired, and hungry.
>Once we made it to the sign that said 'Welcome to Vanhoover!', we were met with a lot of staring eyes as we passed by.
"Look, I know I'm a stranger in a strange land, but staring's rude."
>"Not everypony's seen a hue-min before, Jet. At least they're not running and screaming."
"Did you just... Nevermind. Is there somewhere I could maybe sell off some of my things so I could have some, how did you say, 'bits' on hand?"
>"I can go ask somepony."
"Sure, why not?" Seriously, 'somepony'? 'everypony'?
>She took off, and I just stood in place, watching the various ponies stare up at me, at least some returned a smile when I gave them one, others just looked mildly worried, or didn't even react.
>Scribble came back a few moments later. "Okay, so if we go down two blocks, turn left at Griffon Street, there's a place called 'Hoofful o' Bits' that buys and sells weird things. Maybe they'll buy you?"
"IS slavery allowed in this world?"
>"No, but I'm just joking; no need to be so serious."
"Oh, right. I might have something to interest the shopkeep."
>One short trek later, and I was greeted with the sight of a pawnshop. A ponyfied pawn shop. She wasn't joking though, there was a lot of weird shit on the shelves.
>The shopkeep, a bored looking unicorn who was watching the few ponies in his store peruse his wares, snapped to attention when we walked in.
"Hello. Got some things that might interest ya."
>I watched as Scribble wandered off, much like a child, to go see the various stuff he had.
>"And what are you?"
"I'm a human, not from around here, obviously."
>"Okay then, hue-min. What would you happen to have?"
>I reached into my own bag, and pulled out some trinkets I picked up during my 'travels'.
>He laid them out, sorting them with his hoof, and looked them over with an experienced eye. "I'll give you 10 bits for the whole lot."
"What?! What's there has to be at least worth 20!"
>"Okay, I'm not an unreasonable stallion, I'll do 12."
>I sighed and fished around in my bag, looking for something else to sell. I guess my knife handle must have caught his eye because he looked rather terrified, looked around and hissed "Do you want the Royal Guard to come bucking down my door!?"
"I... No?"
>"Then keep that weapon in your bag, -hidden-."
I looked left, right, and down near around my legs, not seeing a pony around in earshot.
"Would you be interested in buying it?" I leaned in and whispered, brows perking in mild interest.
>"Celestia, I know I'm going to the dungeon for this... Follow me, to the back, and make it quick."
>I hurried behind the counter with him, and down a small hallway, into a room marked 'Storage'.
>Holy shit, this guy had a small armory.
>Granted, all knives, swords, spears, things like that, but damn was it impressive for a small equine.
>"All right, let's see the goods." He went over to a small table, and I followed, fishing out my pair of knives.
>He let out a low whistle of appreciation when I unsheathed them, eyeing them with that same gaze as before.
>"You were packing these beauties? What -are- you, hue-min?"
"I'd rather not say. Hell, I noticed your apprehension with the whole transaction."
>He shot a rather nasty look my way. "You see all this? My foals' foals would be serving the sentence I could get for this. You have to have a license or be a guard to have anything bigger than a cooking knife."
"This place is weird. Anyway. Let's talk business, shall we?"
>"First things first; what's to stop you from squealing on me the second you leave the shop?"
"What's to stop you from turning me in since I'm concealing and carrying?"
>"Fair point. We can either do business like gentlecolts, or you walk out of here and this conversation and room never happened."
"Okay, how much are you willing to offer me for these two?"
>"200 bits for the pair, and nothing more. Still only going 12 on the trinkets though."
"Deal." I held out a hand.
>He put his hoof in my hand, we shook on it.
>He went over to a safe in the corner, I saw his horn glow as he spun the combination lock, and it popped open. He counted out the two hundred in front of me, and I held one up in front of my face.
"Are... Are these real?"
>"What the hay do you take me for? Of course they're real."
"I mean, real gold."
>"So do I."
>My jaw fell open.
>"What, never seen a bit before?"
"Mate, just one day ago, I didn't even realize there was a place small ponies flew, had horns, or even talked. So, pardon me for being blown away by the fact you ponies deal with gold coins for currency."
>He had to chuckle. "What do you hue-mins have for money?"
>I reached into my pocket, pulled out my wallet, and held out a few bills. "This."
>"Paper?"
"Yep. Paper money."
>"That's a load of ponyfeathers."
"No lie, gold is a highly sought after thing where I'm from. Gold, jewels, silver-"
>"Gems are pretty commonplace. I get the occasional Diamond Dog who comes up top and sells them for tools."
>This world is on it's fucking ear, that's for sure.
"Well then, pleasure doing business with you."
>"Not so fast."
>Shit. A double cross?
>"You forgot the paperwork. I still need you to sign off on those baubles of yours."
>Oh, right.I put the rest of the bits in a pocket in my bag, making sure to try to keep the noise minimal.
>We had come back out, to see a curious Scribble staring at me from the other side of the counter.
>"Where'd you go?"
"Had some other business to take care of. It's all straightened out."
>"Oh. Everything okay?"
"Yeah, it's fine." I saw a paper and an inkwell with a quill in there telekinetically brought to me.
>"Sign here, here, and print here, and fill out this section, -honestly-." He marked the four spots with an 'X'
"Lessee, 'always been in my possession', 'yes', 'length' '2 years'." I signed my name with both ponies staring down at my signature.
>"Jet...Fow...Lan?" Both stated at the same time.
"Feh-lahn" I corrected. "It's my surname."
>"That's neat."
"Thanks. Everything in order?"
>The unicorn read over everything that I marked down. "All good." He counted out the money that I was to get for the trinkets out.
"Thank you."
>"My pleasure." The trinkets were lifted in his magical glow, and he had to another section of his counter, to price them.
>Exiting the shop, I put the legitimate money in my pants pocket.
"So, what's there to eat around here? I'm starving."
>"You know, you never did tell me what you eat."
"Food."
>She rolled her eyes. "What -kind- of food, smarty saddle?"
>"Well, fruits, meats, vegetables, grains-"
>"Hold on. You eat -meat-?"
"Yeah." Uh oh. Let the panic begin in 3,2..
>"Oh." Nevermind, she took that rather well. "I think there's a cafe that caters to griffons and ponies. Think we'll have enough?"
"I'm sure we do." I felt a little, okay, a lot bad to lie to the pastel horse, but you gotta do what it takes to survive.

Wait a tic, griffons?!